Case File 39 with Deputy Danny

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Welcome to episode 39 of Thought Cops. This week, America finally gets what it wants as Donald J. Trump is banned from Twitter for an entire 11 minutes. Suck it, libs.

We’re joined this week by Deputy Danny Boy. You may have heard of him.

Turns out Papa John’s is the new official pizza of the alt-right, but let’s be honest, who didn’t see that one coming. Better toss on your MAGA hat, velcro up your New Balances, don a white polo, and walk your pet frog on down to one of the worst pizza franchises that exist in America.

Snoop Doggy Dogg, as my parents used to call him before they were my parents, is in a bit of hot water this week, as it wasn’t enough for him to shoot Donald McDonald the fake president, but had the audacity to identify his corpse at the morgue and then make that his album cover.

Kevin Spacey, as it turns out, might not only be an alleged pedophile, but could also be the first man to choose to be gay. I, like many mainstream news media outlets, can’t decide on what’s the bigger story.

Betsy Devos dressed up as Ms. Frizzle from the popular manga The Magic School Bus this past Halloween, and people who can’t get a grip on their own lives are outraged about it. How dare she dress up as a person that doesn’t exist on a holiday that adults have all decided to take way too seriously all of a sudden.

Also, turns out Osama Bin Laden was a weeaboo. So I guess that’s a thing.

All that and more on this episode of THOUGHT COPS!

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