Case File 1

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Welcome to Thought Cops, the only podcast where we bring in what’s enraging everybody online in order to properly punish them for breaking society’s most important social contracts.

This is our inaugural episode, so we begin by talking about things from the past year, from the downfall to Ken Bone, to racist Harambe memes, to punching Nazis. We hope to get a good approval rating going into this whole thing. If not, we’ll still be here for at least the next four years and there’s nothing you can do about it.

After that, we go over the thought crimes that were committed the past week, most of which occurred at the Super Bowl. Or as Alex Jones likes to call it, the “Super Bowel,” where the most heinous of Satanic Rituals in the name of the New World Order are conducted by the overweight Princess of Darkness herself. We also tackle things like Budweiser shoving their pro-immigrant commercials straight down everyone’s eye-throats. Also, if you didn’t know, the entirety of the game itself was a representation of the ideological war between White and Black America. I didn’t know that, and I still don’t. Maybe I wasn’t watching it close enough.

Listen if you would, to this episode, and let us know what you think about all the topics we discuss. Comment below if you’d like. We’ll hand all opinions to a judge somewhere and later next week we’ll receive the verdicts of all these cases, to be read aloud on the next episode.

Whee-woo whee-woo.

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